A friend of mine posted a status on facebook this week " I need to make a list of all the lists I need to make...that is bad" - Penny
As soon as I read this I instantly laughed, because I totally relate to that. It seems that life has a way of just creeping upon us and then BOO! amazingly enough... all those little things I was aware I took on - surprise me!
I used to think that making a list would help organize my life - and it does for about a month...
Then I am back to where I started - off track and swimming in projects/activities/work/housework etc...
Last night at my Small Group at ThatChurch ( awesomechurchifyouareintheareayoumustvisit! ) we talked about taking off our masks - showing our true selves no matter how hard it was to face ( haha funny pun ) it.
I found that I hide behind this exterior of an 'organized life', I make sure my house is in order when people visit although I am a closet clutterer ( ever seen that episode of Friends where Monica's secret cluttering is discovered? ), I take on projects and activities to make it seem like I have it all together when in reality I am up to my ears in 'stuff' to do. I smile and say "Yes of course I will do that for you!" or "I don't have anything to do so yes, I will take on another project" and in the back of my mind I am screaming "WHAT ARE YOU DOING???!!!!"
In all honesty - if I was to remove my mask.... this one
* i chose this picture b/c to me it shows that i am 'put together' - my hair is done, my makeup on and i am wearing a flashy shirt ( which is so not me by the way ! )
you would find this under my mask....
yes... this is how i look most of the time and sometimes not even that good lol - i am EXHAUSTED in things that should not matter!
I think, as mothers we take on so much extra activities and worry about what others will think when they step into our home, our car or see how we look on an "off day" that we forget our blessings. I know for me, this past week has been a true eye opener. I have had some time to myself ( which is not usually how I roll, I am always around someone doing something ) to reflect and pray and realize that there are so many more important things I could be doing and letting go of some of those 'things' that should not matter.
Romans 12:2
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect
.
Matthew 11:28
Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
i am excited to say that i plan on becoming a small group leader in our emPower groups at church next semester! i have prayed about this since before this past semester began and after witnessing how much of an impact small group has made on my own life, i cannot wait to share with others! becoming a small group leader is one of those things that i NEED to do - no check list - just do.
i have always called myself a free spirit and lead a fun ' on a whim ' kind of life. my dad used to say that Dixie Chicks song 'Wide Open Spaces' was my theme song lol! i think it is so funny that now i have limited myself to check list and organized daily routines!
speaking of list... i have even made my daughter a chore chart, something i told my previous self i would NEVER do! i am thinking ( and she will be thrilled! ) that i will do away with the list next month, it seems to cause more stress and frustration and she is truly a great kid when it comes to helping around the house - if it ain't broke, don't fix it right? i paired the list up with this picture of K's artwork - this is exactly how she should be... free and happy - not tied down to a list or daily routine.
speaking of list... i have even made my daughter a chore chart, something i told my previous self i would NEVER do! i am thinking ( and she will be thrilled! ) that i will do away with the list next month, it seems to cause more stress and frustration and she is truly a great kid when it comes to helping around the house - if it ain't broke, don't fix it right? i paired the list up with this picture of K's artwork - this is exactly how she should be... free and happy - not tied down to a list or daily routine.
2 comments:
my sweet friend!!! I love this blog!! I can soooooo relate to what you are saying in every way! Most days I am in too deep and I strive for something that in the end doesn't matter as much as I think. Most days I have a pony tail, no make up, comfy clothes and various "stuff" on my clothes from Stella, cooking and cleaning. I am disorganized, a closet clutterer, and I buy too much stuff at yard sales. But at the end of the day I am with my family and happy. I try to pick the stuff that matters most and the rest I have to let go of sometimes. I cook almost every night which means a lot to me and it is something I enjoy and do for my family. But I have so much "stuff" I need to do and get rid of and just plain let go. I love getting to know you better. I am so impressed with your decision to lead. I am really trying to get there in my life and in my walk with Christ. We have a lot in common!! Imam the same way about my house and company!! I am exhausted with things too. I love making things for others I have at least 3 things I am making right now and a million more ideas of things I want to make and do for others too!! Free spirit sister, I adore you!
I cant wait to get together with you! We are gonna have a blast lol!
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